Well, its the cheery Christmas season that used to be my favorite holiday of all time. The lights, the food, the Mass celebrated with my father and an entire community. How does one find the holiday spirit when it feels life continues to drain your energy. I'm not talking about normal work and paying bills. I'm talking about your friends and family that you give yourself too. Today was a bit hard, without naming names, I'll give some examples of my drained heart. My PM's, one from a gentle man that lost his dog of 16 years and trying to stay 'happy' while going through mourning. One was from a disgruntled man, his marriage is failing and he was seeking my advice in talking to his wife. Needing reassurance she wasn't going to leave him. My mom must have called me three times to complain about her sister! One was from a long time troll friend that was just fed up with the negative talk and was wondering how others would perceive him if he came out and tried to join the general populous. Another questioned if I was alright for not responding to a forgotten PM. Oh and a great one, *laughs* "you may be making 'x' jealous by talking to me so much".. LOL. Didn't realize I was talking to him all really. I won't mention the heartache blogs people are posting.. our economy is crap!
So I get lost in these remedial messages and tend to lose what is me. I put so much of my heart into other people that I wonder if I'm short changing myself. Yet, other mornings, I rush to the computer like a young school girl and wonder if anyone remembers me or is thinking of me. I laugh at myself often.
It's so nice to have friends that listen and add a shoulder to lean on and a nudge to get the happy thoughts back in place. ♥ ╥╥ò ♥ ╥╥α ♥